A child shares feelings about their identity with their dad in this powerful story about change, acceptance and, above all, love.

One winter, while creating their annual ice rink together, a child starts a conversation with their dad about something important. “Do you ever feel mixed up about who you are?” the child asks. But the father misunderstands the question. So, the child tries again later. “Do you ever feel different than the way you look?” Again, the father doesn’t get it. But this time he asks to hear more. And the child explains. “I look like a boy, but sometimes I feel more like a girl.” At last, it’s been said. The child shares that their name feels like an itchy sweater and they want to change it to “Gray.” It’s a big change, but one they can grow into together. And when Gray’s dad finally uses their chosen name, it feels warm and right, just like hot chocolate after the first skate of the season.

This personal story, co-written by acclaimed author Andrew Larsen and his son Bells, is inspired by Bells’s own experience as a transgender person. It’s about the joy and comfort a child feels when a parent affirms their identity, and how the transition can be complex for the rest of the family. An excellent conversation starter for families with a child who might be questioning their gender identity, it centers the child’s experience of navigating and sharing what they feel, and shows that, though the child’s sense of themself is changing, their place in the family is not. It also demonstrates a supportive and respectful family environment, where home is a safe space. Tallulah Fontaine’s softly focused illustrations punctuated by the red of Gray’s cap create an inviting, wintery setting. 

Content/ Discussion Themes:

Change, Acceptance, Family, Identity, Love, Self-Expression, Gender Identity, Transgender, Empathy, Traditions